Where is this all going to end?
Where is this all going to end?
A friend asked me that once. It seemed like such a simple question and you would think that I would have spent time considering the trajectory of the path that I was on. Maybe I didn’t want to think about it because I knew how things were escalating exponentially. Maybe I just didn’t want to face the inevitable. Maybe I had never cared about myself enough to stop and think. I’m not really sure, but for some reason that question, “where is this all going to end?” was burning a hole into my mind. For days I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I knew my body couldn’t handle much more of the abuse I was putting it under. The painkillers and alcohol I was consuming in one day would have likely killed a normal person. The amount of unhealthy food I was eating would have made anyone sick. Where was this all going to end? Death. Continue reading
The mile I never finished.
“I thought it was amazing that he wasn’t using a wheelchair yet, my goal was to keep him out of one until his next appointment.” That was my doctor’s goal and it had become mine as well. I would leave his office every month with more pain killers, anti-inflammatory drugs, TENS units, expensive custom braces, and whatever else he deemed useful to get me through another month. It had become my normal cycle. Continue reading
Have you ever heard about the dash in the headstone idea? So, I don’t know who the credit goes to for this but it goes something like this. It’s not either of the years on the headstone, it’s how you used the dash in between that counts. That’s actually a pretty cool idea. Continue reading
It had been an entire year of planning and not a day went by where I hadn’t thought about it at one point or another. I had played this day out in my head for an entire year. I anticipated it to be one of the most memorable days in my life and my anticipation did not disappoint. I had never worked so hard toward a goal. Continue reading
Traveling back home from Plantstock 2016 I had the idea to jot down some thoughts and feelings about the amazing event we had just taken in. A sort of “post Plantstock report”, if you will. I also wanted to give the Esselstyn family a proper thank you for opening up their property to perfect strangers and making everyone feel like it was a big family reunion and we all had known each other for years. Their hospitality was off the charts. These two ideas were bouncing around in my head but I couldn’t stop thinking about how big of a deal this event was but the “little stuff” is what made the big stuff bigger…wait..what?!? Continue reading
We had been climbing what sometimes felt like a near vertical trek for hours. Our legs were starting to tire, we were thirsty, a little nauseous, and short of breath. We had finally reached the top of Tuckerman’s Ravine and we were standing at the base of the summit cone with less than a mile to scramble up to the summit. We decided this would be a great place to take a couple minutes to catch our breath, get some water, and prepare for the different terrain that lay ahead.
When I was young my mom once told me that if you needed something done to ask the busiest person you know. Of course, I had no clue what that meant but somehow that has stuck in my mind for over 30 years.
As I type the first few lines and start to gather thoughts I can already tell that this is going to end up a harsh and abrasive genuine rant. I deal with this issue on a daily basis from many different people and I get aggravated. The aggravation doesn’t come from the initial question or problem, it comes from the underlying issue that is sometimes hidden. Continue reading
It’s been a few weeks since I have been able to actually sit down and write. I have been crazy busy getting ready for this marathon and it has been 100 percent of my focus. I finished the marathon, learned a few lessons, and have a couple stories about it. I had every intention of writing about the marathon and maybe I will, but something that Bucky Gleason, a writer from the Buffalo News, said to me has been bouncing around in my head. We had been discussing the estimated time it would take me to run the 26.2 so he could interview me at the finish. I was clearly stressed by wanting to finish at what I thought would be a reasonable time. Then Bucky said something like this, “Your story is not about the finish line, it’s the fact that you made it to the starting line that’s amazing.” I had never thought of it this way. How did I get here? How did we go from considering a motorized scooter to even registering for a marathon? There’s no doubt that many factors were at play but here is a little note I jotted down about a week before the marathon as a blog post idea.
The other day I was walking down a hallway at work and the stage crew was moving things around in and out of the prop room. In the hallway there was a pretty impressive stone wall that was very realistic and had to be 20 feet long and 7 feet tall. It looked like it would be used for a castle or maybe a dungeon. The wall looked like it weighed a ton. Two young ladies were pushing this wall through the hallway with almost no effort whatsoever. As the wall sailed around the corner the young ladies were having a conversation as they walked and acted if the wall didn’t even exist as they moved it. It was hard to see but as I looked closely, I noticed a set of casters at the bottom that were barely noticeable. I never saw the wall on the stage but my best guess is that from the audience’s perspective the wall looked impenetrable and unmovable. Continue reading
I’ve been meaning to write about this topic for a while now. I was reminded of it after a conversation with Josh LaJaunie. Josh will never understand how much our conversations and interactions mean to me. For over 3 years I have felt like I have stumbled around to find how my body works on the most natural level. I have learned so much but I have a ton more to learn. Many of the lessons and new ideas that run through my head Continue reading